jere7my (jere7my) wrote,
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How many disintegrations?

And Remember … No Disintegrations!
"And Remember … No Disintegrations!" by Ryan Brenizer.

TL;DR: Who wants to help me re-create 15 iconic seconds of The Empire Strikes Back? You know you do!

In June, I posted about Star Wars: Uncut, which chopped Star Wars into 500 15-second chunks and gave each one to a different amateur filmmaker to recreate. Which they did, using Legos, animation, live action, rotoscoping, and more. The chunks were reassembled, John Williams's score was added back in, and the final result was released on the internet and the silver screen. It's joyous and jubilant and silly and stupid and frankly wonderful.

Naturally, they're doing Empire.

Naturally, I signed up.

The 15 seconds I chose are the ones that open with Vader shaking his finger in Boba Fett's face: "No disintegrations!" I picked that chunk because I love the bounty hunters — it contains one of Fett's four lines in the film, IG-88 appears next to Fett, and there's a shot between Zuckuss and 4-LOM Dengar and IG-88. And that scene, according to a behind the scenes book I read, was filmed on my 7th birthday.

As it turns out, that chunk is hella complicated. In those 15 seconds, there are six shots, two locations, two VFX shots, four speaking parts, and a circular wipe.

0-1.8s
INTERIOR: STAR DESTROYER BRIDGE.
OTS BOBA FETT TO VADER.
VADER, SHAKING HIS FINGER IN FETT'S MASK: No disintegrations.

1.8-3.7s
REVERSE SHOT.
VADER STEPS OOS LEFT, LEAVING IG-88 AND BOBA FETT IN 2-SHOT. BOTH TURN TO FOLLOW VADER.
FETT: As you wish.
PIETT (off): Lord Vader!

3.7-7.7s
SHOT BETWEEN ZUCKUSS AND 4-LOM DENGAR AND IG-88; WE SEE ONLY THEIR LOWER BACKS.
ZUCKUSS TURNS TO TRACK VADER. 4 OFFICERS CONVERSE OR WALK IN BACKGROUND. ADMIRAL PIETT APPROACHES FROM LEFT, PAST STAR DESTROYER COMMANDER. VADER, FOLLOWED BY CAMERA AS HE WALKS L-R, TURNS TOWARD CAMERA TO FACE HIM.
PIETT: My lord? We have them.

7.7-8.3s
OUT-TO-IN CIRCULAR WIPE

8.3-12.1s
VF/X: STAR DESTROYER PURSUES MILLENNIUM FALCON R-L THROUGH SPARSE ASTEROID FIELD. LASER BLASTS NARROWLY MISS FALCON, EXPLODE BEFORE FALCON EXITS L.

12.1-15.3s
MILLENNIUM FALCON COCKPIT, POV SHOT. OTS HAN SOLO, CHEWBACCA (FRONT), LEIA, C-3PO (BACK). LASER BLASTS OVERSHOOT THE FALCON AND EXPLODE AGAINST THE BACKDROP OF SPACE.
C-3PO STRAIGHTENS, WAVING L ARM: Oh, thank goodness we're coming out of the asteroid field.
(F/X: COCKPIT ROCKS ON "GOODNESS".)

15.3-15.7s
VF/X: STAR DESTROYER MOVES OMINOUSLY TOWARD CAMERA, MILLENNIUM FALCON FLEEING IN FOREGROUND.

So recreating it will be a complicated process, but I'm expecting it to be a hoot and a half, and I'm hoping some of my Boston-area buddies will want to sign on. I want proper live-action, so we'll need actors (Vader, Boba Fett, Admiral Piett, Zuckuss, 4-LOM, background Star Destroyer bridge crew, Han Solo, Chewbacca, Leia, C-3PO), a cameraman, "lovingly" "handcrafted" costumes, papercraft models of a Star Destroyer and the Millennium Falcon, brainstorming, &c. If anyone has a camcorder that can shoot HD, that'd be very useful. (I can shoot 640x480 with my camera, but they prefer HD video.) I will do all directing and editing tasks, and break everything up into a manageable to-do list.

Principal photography is likely to be the weekend of September 29-30, with costuming and construction done piecemeal over the next two weeks. I don't expect any of it will take more than a few hours — this is not just shoestring, but the kind of shoestring that's probably going to snap if you tug too hard when you're tying your shoes. Final delivery is no later than October 11. And after the whole shebang is released, you might end up on-screen at the Brattle Theater.

May the Force be with us.
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